A Fight Club All His Own

Well.... I was sitting around one day, letting my my mind wander.... I thought of the amusing possiblities that a certain agreement made by all Harry Potter's D.A. Club members (especially if a member broke the agreement!) might have. One of those possibilites came out in the form of a "Fight Club" farce.
All I have to say to all you snitches out there,
Always play by the rules when it comes to your face... If it's too late for that now... Then Long Live Soap (and we have plenty of that in Fight Club)! For it might help you clean up pimples on that taddling face.